So Sorry - February 06, 2022 - This is my story!

This is my story! 24 years ago, I wrote about my first-hand experiences during the Adapazarı-Gölcük and Düzce earthquakes.

And on the morning of February 6, the earthquake not only hit our doorstep again, but also destroyed it... I have shared this story several times over the years on various occasions, always with the aim of stimulating the empathy of my younger brothers and sisters. Today, I am 61 years old and I was 38 years old when my story was written. We are only human when we can see, feel and help others' pain as if it were our own.

Good reading,
Özhan Erem

I, who would not wake up if they threw a ball, woke up five minutes after the earthquake... There is a different energy, a restlessness in me.

And it begins... That tremendous tremor that freezes and locks you in place, with a tremendous gürültültüy coming from deep within...

I look out the window...

I'm looking at the European side of the Bosphorus, at the tall buildings in the area with the skyscrapers... it's like I'm frozen, my only thought is;

"Which one will be demolished"?..

It's as if I'm watching it on a movie screen or TV screen;

"Which one will be demolished"?..

I can neither pray, nor do I feel like running and hiding... Nor am I running to my sleeping children inside... As if I am just a spectator of that moment...

I am neither inside nor outside... I'm almost like a rüyada, just looking; 

"Which one will be demolished"?..

10 gün later....

Friday, August 27, 1999; we have been watching for about ten days;

Söz is always on the news... every event reflected is a drama...

There are also joys... Miracles that came out from under the rubble... Small but big miracles...

The line "Is anyone there?"" echoing in the ruins is engraved in our minds...

Acute gönüllüs" is the new hero of all the kids I know and mine...

They are symbolized by their ties çözük boots and white masks...

For about ten days we have been just watching and listening! Aid convoys...

When the TVs reflect the despair there, it makes our people want to give and give and give... to those who collect aid...

Eh, we are human... we are uncomfortable!.. We need to do something, as a family...

Sunday, August 29, 1999, noon, Adapazarı...

We enter Adapazarı with two truckloads of food... One of the trucks is filled with food and supplies, the other with cologne...

The disaster coordination center does not accept... "We are full to the brim, Gölcügötürün" they say...

The roads are closed, we are moving at ox cart speed...

We are arriving... A pungent odor in the interior of the gölcüğüğün!... that smell makes my hâlâ içim tremble when we remember it...

The roadsides are full of clothes brought/donated by benefactors, but no one even looks at the clothes...

Çünkü there is still hope öbek öbek öbek hope at the beginning of the rubble... suddenly I get out of the car and head towards the truck full of cologne "açin" I say, "give me some cologne"... I distribute as much cologne as I can... a bottle for everyone... It's like they are being washed... the one who finishes, wants another bottle, another bottle... it feels like cologne...

The cologne seller asked my father; "why are you buying so much cologne? When he said it would be distributed to earthquake victims, he didn't take money for a truckload of cologne...

I ask those in the rubble; "How did it happen? "...

They say; "One of them died screaming"... Someone adds; "No supplies, no food, no clothes, no blankets... Saving lives is important, the rest is history...

I resolve, I pledge; "If it happens again, I will get there immediately and save as many lives as I can"....

With this great trauma, I return to my own world, Istanbul... life goes on...

A kaç month later...

Friday, November 12, 1999, Istanbul... It's 18:57th... I get caught in Levent, in my office...

A smaller tremor than on August 17th, but this time I feel it in my bones... Çünkü now I know, I think of what I saw with my gözüm just a few months ago... I shiver... 

"has anything been destroyed?"", "öif so, where, how many people, how öldü" or "is anyone öldü"...

The first impulse is to find out the condition of those closest to you, then to get news immediately...

Hey hat! Çel;conflicting and inconsistent news is raining down on us...

It's already evening, I immediately set off for home... Kavacik, Beykoz...

I get the right news from the radio in the car; "Central üssü Düzce......"...

"Düzce'cannot be reached"...

I'm glued to the TV at home... More news, more news...

There is a live phone call on a channel... Düzce State Hospital Chief Physician, wailing, figan!...

Speaking from the car; " I haven't reached the hospital yet" he says... "There is debris and smoke everywhere" he says...

I am devastated, I remember my promise; "If it happens again, I will get there immediately and save as many lives as I can"....

I call our driver Eray, I say "Come quickly, we are going to Düzce to save lives"...

I'm wearing the boots like the hero of the last earthquake, Akut, with the laces on...

I have a pickaxe in the garden, but it doesn't fit in the trunk of the car... "Cut it" I say to Eray, "Cut some of the handles so they can fit"...

After Adapazarı, the Gendarmerie has closed the highway, saying only emergency aid can pass through...

I call out to the gendarmerie in the manner of a commander... "Son aç, we are on duty!" I say...

"Head üstüne" he says, opening the barrier... We are leaving... I look behind me, except for the live broadcast cars, not a single God's servant leaves...

The road is empty, so we step on it...

And we are at Düzce's...

Haydâ!, I don't know where to start... Many of the buildings have collapsed... smoke is billowing from the ground...

We have to start somewhere... The first thing I see is the rubble of the building...

"Is anyone there!"...I shout; “Is anyone there! No sound!...

A five-story apartment building... it's tilted like an accordion... a few steps and I'm on the fifth floor... a little further back the rooms appear...

I'm in the kitchen now!... food is obviously cooking, everything is a mess... I touch the pot on the floor to see if it's still hot... the fridge is overturned, curtains have fallen on it... My eyes are searching for people on the ground, I am calling out again...

It is not possible to reach the lower floors, but there is no sound anyway...

I'm leaving...

A little further on is a building, this time the floors are stuck together... the bottom two floors are partially accessible...

Eighty, ninety centimeters down a floor... I enter... the furniture is crushed and crushed... my eyes are looking for people again, I call out... no answer!...

Just as I was leaving, I saw Jülide Ateş, who was there that night chasing news on behalf of TGRT, coming towards me from the car and asking "Is there anyone there?". I say "no"...

Probably he thought that I was an earthquake survivor who had escaped from the rubble...

I remember most of the earthquake victims I met there as people with bruised faces, sitting on the sidewalks, staring blankly at a fixed point, trying to get over the initial shock...

Finally, we make warm contact with someone under the rubble;

A building a little more in the center, also tilted back... as we enter it, the ceiling is lowering... just as we reach the most secluded part, the aftershock starts!...

It's an incredible feeling, you're in a collapsed building and there's an earthquake again!...

The building is already dilapidated, it could collapse at any moment, and you are waiting for the tremor to pass...

When the tremor is over, other search and rescue workers like us come to them...

One of them says, "Abi, there is a noise coming from the wall behind you"...

More öago he had detected it, but when the aftershocks started, he went outside... When I pay attention to that point, I hear a deep voice, a plea...

It is coming from behind the wall where I am, where I am leaning back...

His name was Hüseyin's...

I talk to him, trying to pinpoint his exact location... "I can't feel my leg" says Hüseyin...

I need to jump downstairs... I find a hole, but it's pitch black down there, I don't know how many meters... I say "Lantern", two minutes later it comes from hand to hand... from the hole, the floor of the lower floor is about two buçuk meters, I immediately hang down, hopefully I am on the floor...

This is the floor under the beam where Hüseyin's is... again I can't reach but now we can talk comfortably... blood is dripping from the beam, obviously dripping from Hüseyin... through the hole I am reporting coordinates to those above...

Teçhized teams and ambulance arrive, rescue begins...

We dive into a dark alley again with Eray... I don't know what happened to Hüseyin'39;, whether he survived or not...

A little further, I see a plot of land, two meters of rubble...

It is clear that the building has been completely çökmüd...

Üzer ç˘ ˘, calling out, no answer...

Eray finds a safe, the safe is closed but the keys are on it... I say, "Take out the keys, throw them away"...

Now that it is almost morning, those rescued from the rubble are being taken to the State Hospital...

"Let's go to the hospital" I say...

The hospital is full. The wounded are lying on mattresses in the garden... The staff are working hard but it is impossible for them to keep up with so many injured people...

"Come on Eray" I say, "plaster arms"

A woman is on the ground, moaning with an IV drip in her arm, obviously in serious condition... Next to her is a five-year-old girl, also with an IV drip in her arm, crying...

"Are you in pain, baby" I say... """I have work" she says, crying...

I, who for years made both my sons pee every night, am left in a helpless situation... Hiç I didn't make a girl pee!...

But you can just grab the boys' penises forward, and that's it!...

"Destur" I say, I put my arms on the seat and grab the girl, Eray holds the IV...

We immediately go to a part of the garden, do it, the baby relaxes...

His mother thanks him with her eyes...

The next day we are in Istanbul at noon... Tired, tired but peaceful...

I tell my late mother what we went through... On the one hand, he's "züzülülütired, and on the other hand, he's proudly caressing my saçs.

Özhan Erem
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